爱情的路 by 蔡健雅

Somewhat related to the topic we're on, a fren asked me.
Fren:"How many guys did u reject so far?"
Me:"Ehh, err.. ermm.. 3??"
Fren:"Wah dat's quite a few.. i nvr even had one confession."
Me:"arhhh.." (lost for words)

I spent a while thinking last nite. I met up with the fren again jus now.
Me:"Err.. actually i thot of it last nite. i've rejected 5 guys.. not 3.."
Fren:"Wat!?! U know, u're actually having more than my those very chio frens!"
Me:"arhhh..." (..... again)

I feel like a sinner. I've broken so many hearts.. UNREALISINGLY!!

Guy 1 came about in my early days of poly. i think it was ard the 2nd semester. The fella called my house in the late afternoon. Having just stepped out from bath, i rushed to the phone, towel clad, half expecting it to be some project matters. But it was not to be. The fella started off tokking some crap, then he asked me if i could be his stead. All these while i was still in my towel. My reaction was, is he serious?? He doesnt sound serious to me, i dun know him that well, and theres already some rumours with him liking another classmate. i apologized, gave some crap excuse of studies 1st, and diverted his attention from the topic. Then he said, ya he know lah, that i like someone else. (which is true..) Anyway, this fella finally ended up the class couple with the girl in the rumour for about 2++ yrs.

Guy 2, not sure if he's considered under the rejected list as he din even pop the question. We started off command prompting each other, even after the IT class ended, we were still at our pcs /prompting. Thus rumours started flying ard, but we still continued our /prompting. Forgot the topics that we /prompted about. Should be mostly craps. Once he asked me to accompany him to hmv to buy a jap soundtrack, think it was under one roof. So i went, with 2 spies (grace n emily)somewhere ard as we went orchard together after jap class. It was a bit awkward, since its my 1st time out with a guy, think we did nothing much, got the cd, walked ard, and went back. no hands holding, no confession. 3 yrs down the road, just b4 we graduate from poly, we were irc/icq-ing(forgot which) late at nite. He admit he did have a feeling for me in yr 1, but he did not have the confidence that he will be able to commit to the relationship, so he gave up. i forgot what i replied, but i can feel it during those /prompting times lah. We still call each other the nicknames we gave each other.

Guy 3, a persistent fella, well known for his pick-up acts, typically notorious among all my frens, my usual clique and one of my frens whom he tokked to on the bus. we were in the same jap class, he's always sitting behind my row with his handsome fren whom my clique have a crush on. somehow he got my pager number, wasnt that bad, other than the irritating pager ringing his number, which i can choose not to return. i forgot how n why but i was already a bit avoiding him. Came a period when i changed from pager to hp and he couldnt find me. Peace. But not for long. He bumped into me while i was sms-ing my juniors b4 basketball training. At that situation, i've got no choice but to give him my hp no.
Calls came, both at home and hp no. Then he asked me out once, to walk ard i think, i was like, wats wrong? so i went out with him on a weekend, to have chicken rice at some famous store, then went flea market, i wanted to buy a handphone pouch but he paid for me.
When we're on our way to our next location, he passed me a small (really small.. abt 3 inch) bouquet of paper flowers. i asked him wat for? he jus said nothing.. jus for a fren. n i stupidly accepted it. we walked a while more then he asked me for the time. I'm still kicking myself for being so naive not to notice that he had his OWN WATCH. (i saw it after the incident) Innocently i pulled out my hand from my pocket n let him see the time. The next thing he did, he grabbed my hand, crossed his fingers with mine, n pulled me crossed the road and into the shopping mall. I asked him y he's holding my hand. He said, normal fren mahh. That was when i had a bad impression of him. The hr long calls became more frequent, at inappropriate hrs, like when i was engrossed in some nba game, i jus let him rumble on without paying attention. He popped the question in a few of the calls n keep asking me out and i continued to reject him. Then it became intolerable, phone ringing when i was in ktv, more and more frequently. In the end, my air stewardess fren stepped up and staged a play. Yes he is THAT famous that both my poly clique n my sec sch clique noe abt him. After that, it was peace, and still is, except for some occasional msn message, which r quite harmless since he already stated that he's not interested in me anymore. (thank god) But i hate to answer hi how r u stuff, so i chose to ignore sometimes.

Guy 4. Ok he's my sec sch clique and rumoured with me oso. i kinda like his gentlemanly ways since sec sch. Coming out from NS, he's become more toned and muscular. *drool* ok lah.. he confessed when i was in my poly final yr. Final yr mahh, knowing the workload i have, i rejected him asking him to wait til i graduate 1st. I wasnt ready and confident i can commit also, althou i like him. I still hang out with him occasionally with the whole clique, but surrounded by uni gers in the dorm, wasnt sure if he found another target anot. Waiting for him to ask me again.

Guy 5, was younger than me. I would still prefer an older guy. Younger would make me feel like i'm going out with my bro. He'll sms me frequently when he's bored, normal stuff like wat his attachment work for the day went, blah blah blah. In IRC, he had a very obvious nick, and he'll sing those touching songs in ktv thou he's voice aint the best. I rejected him once or twice but he kept on. Jus a pity he's younger and i'm conservative. He's just not my type.

For all the 5 guys above, I'm really sorry for breaking ur heart, spoiling ur couragous moments. i'm just not ready at that time.

For those who don't know me, I'm NOT PRETTY. Nvr in the category of pretty. I'm NOT LADYLIKE either. I'm just a normal, tomboyish, average build, quite low profile girl.

2 yrs of blank and i'm wondering y. Now i noe. Its my karma.